When Victoria Beckham recently posted a birthday message to her daughter on her social media page, it started a controversial conversation going. It had nothing to do with the message really, it was all about the picture which she attached to the message – a picture of her kissing her daughter on the mouth!
People commented on the picture, some in complete admiration for the gesture of affection, whilst others frowned upon it. There is no consensus on the matter, however, there are may be some findings which can help you decide.
Familyshare recently compared the opinions of experts in the field of psychology, but it seems there is no consensus there either.
University of California UCLA psychologist, Dr. Charlotte Reznick says that a peck on the lips from parents can in fact cause confusion. Reznick said:
“If you start to kiss your kids on the mouth when they are young, when do you stop? It’s extremely confusing,”
Reznick said that when children reach the age of 5 or 6, they become aware of their sexuality and they could, in fact, be stimulated by a kiss on the lips. She says that a kiss on the lips is confusing for them – they see their parents kissing on the mouth and then Mom and Dad do the same with them!
The solution is probably to stop doing it at the appropriate time, but all children mature differently which makes one specific age hard to pinpoint.
Dr. Fiona Martin from Sydney Child Psychology Centre disputes this theory. She thinks it is completely ridiculous that parents kissing their kids on the lips could be considered sexual. Martin said:
“It is normal and healthy to show affection for your children. You are communicating to your children that you love them,”
Martin says there is no evidence proving that kissing your children on the lips creates any problems later on in life. Many parents kiss their kids throughout their lives and in some families, that is completely normal, whereas others are not comfortable with it at all.
It however, seems that there is no right answer here, but with most aspects of parenting, do what feels right and best for your children.