A Wichita mom’s recent Facebook post to a department store clerk has gone viral after her 13-year-old daughter was told by the clerk that she needed to put on a pair of Spanx (the body shaping garment).
Lexi and her mom, Megan Harris were shopping for a dress for her middle-school formal. They visited the Dillard’s in Towne East Square where Megan found a long red dress and thought her daughter would look stunning in it. However Lexi didn’t love the dress, but to please her mom, she tried it on. Lexi didn’t love it but Megan thought she looked great and took a picture of her in it.
The Sales clerk then walked in and said that if Lexi was going to wear the dress to the formal, she would need to wear a pair of Spanx. Even though Megan told the clerk that Lexi looked just fine, the clerk insisted that Lexi needed the Spanx.
After the incident, Megan posted, “I wish I had told you how many girls suffer from poor self-image and telling them they need something to make them perfect can be very damaging…. My daughter is tall; she swims, runs, dances and does yoga. She’s fit. She’s beautiful. She did not need you telling her that she is not perfect.”
That post has been shared over 95-thousand times and has over 500,000 likes.
Dear sales lady at Dillard’s Towne East Mall, This is my teenage daughter who wanted to try on dresses for an upcoming…
Posted by Megan Naramore Harris on Wednesday, January 20, 2016
As a female, who’s been 13 before, I know just what effects such words can do to a young developing mind. So it’s really hard for me to believe that another female would be so insensitive.
As parents, we need to be cognisant of what we say and do when it comes to our daughter’s body image. Here are a few tips on how to ensure our daughters have a good body image:
1. Rather talk about who your daughter is instead of how she looks
We often say to our daughters ‘You look so pretty today,’ but rarely say things like, ‘You were such a good friend today,’ or ‘You handled that situation very well.’ It’s very beneficial to compliment girls on their assertiveness and even their resentment with statements like, ‘You were really brave to tell me how upset you were,’ or ‘I like how you stood up for yourself.’
2. Talk about the flawless women in magazines
Girls’ images of themselves are moulded by what they see around them – by brand names in magazine and on television shows which focus more on what women wear and how their bodies look than on what they can actually do. Talk with your girls about what they see to balance the effects of these images. Start this conversation early. As early as the age of two, kids are already aware of brand names, so think of what the images selling those brands may be doing to them.
3. Get Dad involved
Girls need to hear some affirmation from their fathers, not only for looking beautiful but for other qualities that they appreciate. Girls also need to hear their Dads supporting their wives too!
The way Dad treats Mom and Daughter, is the way she will be expected to be treated by her male partners later in life.