Whenever I am distracted, my child acts out or takes advantage of the situation (me being distracted) to make not the best choices. I have noticed that in general, there are times in which as a parent and as a person I feel very distracted and scattered. There is too much to do and accomplish, which can make me feel drained.
As a single parent, this is familiar territory and honestly any parent can relate to feeling as if that “to-do list” is all-too large and overbearing! With that being said, there are still times in which amongst all the chaos, we parents have to reel it in and prioritize what truly needs to be done in the moment…or what can be left behind. Here are 3 ways being distracted can prevent you from being an effective parent.
1- Discipline is Tossed Aside
It is hard to be an effective parent when you’re distracted. This means that the more disconnected, frazzled or preoccupied you are by other thoughts, the less apt you are to discipline effectively. You may find yourself yelling more or repeating yourself or simply handing out empty threats if you try to manage the kids while distracted.
If you want to be there to note when your kids are making poor choices or even better, note when your child is making great choices, work on prioritizing what needs to be done in that moment. Will worrying right this minute help? Do you really need to multitask so many things at once? Prioritize or your kids’ behaviors will tank.
2- Missing the Magic
Are you getting quality play time with your kids? Did you miss what they did at the park? Are you really listening to what they are saying? I feel as a single parent sometimes I have so much on my plate that the days whirl together. I really could stand to live more in the moment and set little things aside for another time. Life will go on if my floors are not sparkling. Emails can be answered tomorrow.
3- Kids May Act Out
In order to get you back from that “preoccupied zone” you are in, your kids may act out. This is not a good thing. If your child is making a lot of bad choices, consider one of the reasons may be your child feels neglected or as if he or she has to compete to get your attention.
Last tips:
Some things that distract the everyday parent:
– social media
-texts
-money woes…try to schedule a time or set hours to manage monetary issues
-marital/divorce issues…getting into counseling as a couple or seeing a therapist to help the two of you coparent better…or even sticking to email or calls at set times of the day or week may allow you to focus on the moment rather than bury yourself in drama